Vacation: Miserable and Fun?

I have been thinking about this lately:

I recently lost someone I considered a best friend. I lost him to apathy, the definition being: lack of interest, enthusiasm, or concern. Synonyms: indifference, unconcern, listlessness. It sucks.

I went up to the Berg, a couple weeks ago, to visit all my friends that I haven’t seen in eons. I was in desperate need of a vacation and wanted to be around the people that I loved and missed. It didn’t turn out how I expected at all. Can something make you miserable but be absolutely perfect at the same time? I would not go back and change anything that happened. I learned so much. Since I am so fond of lists, I shall make one:

Things I Learned In the Berg

1.       I have a love/hate relationship with flying

2.       Danielle is an excellent travel companion

3.       There are still wonderful people who will drive half an hour to the airport to pick you up even though he has never met you

4.       Jasmyne is an excellent hostess

5.       It really, really hurts to have someone look at you in horror, even if you never did anything to deserve that look and have been looking forward to making them squirm for months

6.       You find out who actually cares when you run into people who didn’t expect to see you

7.       No matter how excited you are to surprise someone, see them, and give them a hug… when they aren’t excited to see you, it will leave you speechless. You will feel blind sighted for the rest of the weekend and wonder why you wasted so much time staying friends with the idiot boy

8.    Something wonderful can be staring you in the face but you won’t realize it until you’re sitting on the airplane flying home… then it will hit you like a train… and you will wonder why you’ve been so blind

9.       Idaho is a cold place

10.   People will always surprise you

That weekend was devoted to putting the past behind me. I was definitely able to do that. I had to put more people back there than I planned, though. It hurt. It was hard. It was exactly what I needed.

I am ready to go back. Back to the Berg. I want to get on with my life and with school. I can’t wait for the next adventure!

I am so grateful to be grateful. I love what my trials have taught me. I love the knowledge and experiences that I’ve gained through the ups and downs of life. I love what I’ve learned from all the different people that I’ve had the pleasure to meet. Some have taught me different things about myself, while most have showed me exactly who and what I do NOT want to be. Life lessons are definitely best learned through experience. I’m so thankful that I am here to experience life! What a blessing.

 

Hearts,

me



Yo, Jacob!

I was just complaining to Angela tonight that I don't have anything to blog about. I'm fresh out of ideas. I've got nothin'. Sometimes I can be pretty thick...

This is completely ridiculous because exactly 18 years ago today, one of the most amazing people I know was born. Jacob Merrill Standage. If I have a sibling who's the most like me, it's him. (Sorry, Jacob!) We're crazy, hilarious people who care too easily and get our hearts broken too much. Seriously! We're the kind of people who will kindly give you chance after chance after chance, even though you really don't deserve one. Bless him. Jacob is quite fantastic.

Isn't he the cutest thing you ever did see! ;)

When I was going into 6th grade, my family was living in the little podunk town of Enid, Oklahoma. My dad was in the Air Force and that was where he was stationed. He was getting out of the Air Force at the time and the plan was to move the family to Mesa, Arizona where most of both sides of the extended families lived. Plans didn't go as expected so my mom ended up sending us older children, Isaac, Ben, and myself to Arizona to start school. She kept the three younger kids with her.

I had a beautiful quilt that my Grandma Standage had made me for Christmas a couple years earlier. It was a purple checkered thing. I loved it. I didn't take it with me to Arizona. Honestly, I have no idea why.

Talking to my mom after being gone for about a week, she informed me that Jacob had stolen my quilt. He missed me and had been sleeping with it ever since I left. Needless to say, I was touched. Actually, my sixth grade self was more ticked than touched. (How dare he! That's MY quilt.) Hindsight is 20/20, though. The funny thing about this story is that I never got it back. My quilt, I mean. Once the rest of the family moved out to Arizona, Jacob kept the quilt. If I remember correctly, I tried to get it back a couple of times. I was horridly unsuccessful.

To this day, he still sleeps with that quilt. I can't think of anywhere else I would rather have it be, than on his bed. It has been a constant reminder through the years how much he actually loves me... especially during these rocky teenage years. Granted, it has also helped remind me how much I love him. ;)

Yes, ladies.
He is actually this good looking.
Amen.

Jacob "Nun" Standage. Yup. He's freaken hilarious.

     


 

Jacob! Thanks for being one of the best brothers a girl could ever hope to have. Your sense of humor is priceless. You are quite good looking. You have the biggest heart. You are the most loyal guy I know. You are the brother that will beat up the guys that break my heart or make me cry. It's splendid! Those guys are all lucky that they live so far away. How blessed you are to have such a stunning, admirable, perfect older sister. Haha! I know that you will always be there for me, no matter what! Also, you get me delicious hot dogs and red cream soda from M&M. That alone is priceless!

 

Have an amazing and memorable 18th birthday! I love you so, so much. I don't know what I would ever do without you in my life. <3

 

Hearts,

me

 

P.S. Someday, I would actually like that quilt back. Just sayin'...